The Hook...

Magical Words

So...Faith just posted a great article on the why's behind her first few paragraphs in her third novel.  It seemed like a very good exercise so I thought I'd post the first couple of paragrapha of my Steampunk novel and walk through it.

Ella stood over the body, her hand covering her mouth.  The early morning fog slithered along the ground, covering and uncovering the fallen man.  The corpse lay sprawled across the cobblestone streets of London.  One hand reached out grasping over the pavement.   

Okay so, opening paragraph.  The novel is a mystery in the vary traditional sense.   First scene is off the dead body.  I also want to introduce the main character and set the tone.  I'm still not terribly happy with the first scene.  I do kind of want the impression that the fog is snakelike as it moves across the body and I want to let people know that it takes place in London. 

Kneeling down, she gingerly turned the body over.   The brown eyes of her courier, Julian Cole, stared up her.  Her shrill scream sliced through the fog and then echoed across the empty streets.   With a presence of mind, she did not know she had, Ella walked over to the police alarm and pulled it.  Soon the blue lights and whining siren filled the morning air.

Okay, now, we've set the scene in terms of time - early morning, empty streets.  I want to show that our Hero is stunned by the fact that it is someone she knows but still is aware enough to sound the alarm.

She walked back and stood over her friend.   His face was black and blue except for a long red scratch across one cheek.  His overcoat and vest were wrinkled and wet from the morning dew.  She noticed his pockets were askew as if they had been turned out but his pocket watch lay on the ground beside him.  A part of her noticed the face had been shattered and the time stopped at twenty-three minutes past three.

Here I want to describe the murder scene.  Clues here need to lead to our first suspects.

One of things I've noticed immediately, is that I'm setting this in Victorian England w/ a Steampunk twist...and nothing in my first 3 paragraph sets that up.  This could easily be a modern death scene so I need to add something to make the era more obvious - maybe a mention of her skirts??

So, I definitely need to keep these kind of things in mind as I start editing.  Of course, I'm a long way from editing.  I want to get the actual novel written first!  And that is my nanowrimo project so feel free to follow along. 

We travel on the road to adventure
On a desert highway straight to the heart of the sun
Like lovers and hereos, and the restless part of everyone
We're only at home when we're on the run
On the run...
~Rush, Dreamline

Stalled momentum

So I've reached a creative stall.   I had some time to write yesterday, while the Geeklet was sleeping but couldn't come up with anything.  Is that sad?

On an unrelated note, I saw briefly that Under the Black flag has a pirate themed short story contest going.  Max words is 4000 though and I think that Making History is more than that.   I have the twingiest of an idea for another pirate story so I may see if I can get enthusiastic about writing it...of course, still need a plot!

Maybe if I can get a bit of momentum going toward one story I can pick up speed on others.  It's a bit of a struggle right now.   And that sucks given that I'm supposed to be a guest at 3 cons in the spring, I really need to get some work finished and/or published. 


It's such a cloudy day
Seems we'll never see the sun
Or feel the day has possibilities
Frozen in the moment -
the lack of imagination
Between how it is and how it ought to be~Rush, How it is

Just saying...
~Fireheart

Publication Date Change and some upcoming thoughts

So due to some contract changes, Spells & Swashbucklers release looks like it will be delayed until March 2012. But we will be getting ebook and traditional books when it comes out!

In other news, I've been working on the short story for Fortannis. I finally have it all plotted out and now it's just a matter of actually doing the writing.

A friend of mine, also reminded me of the Jim Baen memorial Short Story Contest that is now open. I have the vaguest idea around a story...something about space pirates and the privitization of space exploration. That or there is this really amazing picture of a woman on a space ship holding a sword...I swear there is a story in there as well but I'm not 100% certain the picture isn't supposed to be of Weber's Honor Harrington. I also have a chase scene in my head a la Red Barchetta in space but since it requires asteriods, I'm not sure if that is too close to Star Wars.

I do plan on doing NaNoWriMo again this year. Concentrating on the Steampunk mystery of course. So I'm spending a lot of time plotting, writing up characters, etc. Hopefully, that will allow me to just dive into the writing part in November.

Wind in my hair/Shifting and Drifting/
Mechanical Music/Adrenelin Surge
~Rush, Red Barchetta

So...I really need to work on the updating regularly thing...

But as an apology...have a random vignette...

****

Tessriel stood in the doorway looking one last time over the room she had spent the last 11 years. Once filled with knick-knack’s and memoralbia, it was now nearly empty. A single bed lay against one wall with a nightstand topped with a silver lantern beside it. A pair of wooden chairs flanked a small table where she and William would play chess(?). Where once the room was filled with noise and laughter, it now seemed empty and quiet. Forlorn.
William walked up to stand beside her, carrying his youngest daughter. Hearing his footsteps, Tessriel turned to face him, reaching out to take the 3 month old baby.
“Are you ready?” he asked.
“Yes and at the same time, no.” she replied as she cradled the little girl, looking back at the room.
William placed a hand companionably on her shoulder. “You deserve this, you know. You spent over 10 years chasing me around, keeping me out of trouble. It’s time you did something for yourself.”
“I know.” Tessriel said as she buried her face in the newborns fuzzy hair. Her voice faltered and William could see the beginnings of tears glistening in her eyes.
“Hey, are you okay?” Concern filled William’s voice.
Tessriel took a deep breath. “It’s funny. It seems as if I’ve only spent a blink of an eye’s worth of time in your House but I’ve watched you grow up from a little boy to the young man that you are now.” She nuzzled the little girl again. “Married, and with a child of your own. I can’t help but wonder if I am doing the right thing?”
“Leaving?”
“Yes. My family has always served the Brevoy nobles. When House Rogarvia disappeared, my father sent me here while he sought out the Rogarvian’s. My role was to serve you and now that you are grown, or at least grown in the eyes of the nobility, shouldn’t I be here to serve Alistria?”
“Oh, Ria. Your sense of dedication is amazing. But Alistria won’t need you for a few years yet. You took charge of me when I was 12(?) and look how I turned out. I think we can manage to raise her for 2-3 years without you.”
“A part of me knows that but at the same time I am hesitant.”
“Hey,” he turned her to face him. “Do you remember the flood?”
She cracked a smile. “Of course, you were utterly terrified of being swept away.”
“And you kept me calm, while at the same time protecting us from the rabble who sought to take our lives in the confusion. You didn’t hesitate then; you knew exactly what the right thing to do was.”
William reached out to take the sleeping baby; with his other hand, he picked up the backpack that lay on the bed. Handing it to Tessriel, she shouldered it. He then reached over, picked up her cane and handed it to her.
Taking it, Tessriel looked at her reflection in the blue orb that topped the black cane. She smiled. “I guess we are both ready.”

***

 

Thoughts?

 

In an uplifting note, while I missed Allen's Big Event on Saturday, I got to catch up with an old friend from HS who is also a published author on Friday.  Cathy Wiley... check out her webpage here!   We both were huge Trixie Belden Mystery fans back in HS and she's published her first mystery novel.  Now I just have to figure out how she did it! 

 

Right so back to work!

~T

 

Summer's going fast, nights growing colder
Children growing up -- old friends growing older
Experience slips away... ~Rush, Time Stands Still

On finding time to write...

So I have been challenged to find time to write lately.  I realized that I hadn't been into my Steampunk story the entire month of June!  That's not going to get me published if I don't write!  I did work a little last night but 15 mins here and there is probably not going to cut it.

For that matter, I haven't been in my new Fortannis story either.   I'm beginning to think I need to schedule time to write on the weekends.  But if I do, I think it needs to be upstairs or in the kitchen.  If the Geeklet is in the room, she usually ends up wanting my "tention."

There was a great post I read about how challenging it is to write when interrupted by children and the "rules" mom's need/have put in place.

top-ten-allowable-reasons-for-interrupting-moms-while-shes-working
And while I would love to put something like that in place, the Geeklet is 3...

I could take time to write during my lunches at work but because I am trying to exercise some at work; I tend to work through lunch most days.  I've been able to schedule Yoga and Walking around 9:30 am.  It gives me a chance to come in; check email, touch base.  Then go up and get focused for the day.  And I'm not sure I really want to give that up.  It seems to have centered my "being" a bit more.

Well, I do need to get back to work.  

(CTMH:  Happy Birthday!)

And I believe in love /And that's faith enough for me
"Faithless" Snakes & Arrows - Rush
~T

New Fortannis Story

Beginning sentence:

Chandri bowed her head, her mouth dry after reciting the vows that made her a knight.

Ending sentence: "I think we can carry enough rations on the horses to cover us between towns."  

Word count: 1028

Not a bad start.  Particularly for a day when I really only had about an hour of uninterrupted writing time. 

And before I forget,other ideas:

Princess turned Pirate, These are the times.

"Net boy, net girl
Send your signal 'round the world
Let your fingers walk and talk
And set you free"

"Vertigo," Rush, Test for Echo

Anne Bonny's Child off to the editor!

Edits to Anne Bonny's Child are finally complete and off to the editor!   I hope she likes the changes.  All in all, I'm pretty happy with how the story turned out.  
Now I can concentrate on the Steampunk novel.  
Though I do have a possible idea for a short story in Fortannis again.   I also want to try to work on Ghost of a Chance.  I'm also wondering if there is a short story in the Styx song "These are the times." 

On the edge of sleep,/I heard voices behind the door/The known and the nameless, familiar and faceless/
My angels and my demons at war/ Which one will lose -- depends on what I choose/Or maybe which voice I ignore...
"Double Agent" Rush